Young Women from 24 to 32 or so that really NEED HELP TO GET THEIR LIVES ON TRACT... AND wanting a 2nd chance & the difficult time they have. Me, lupus, RA, Sinus infections infections and Life!

Lupus Flares, Pain Pump refill, Young Women & getting another chance to change their lives, LIFE, and Chronic Illnesses with PAIN!

Everyone, it has been MORE THAN AN INSANE WEEK OR MORE FOR ME! Between my own doctors visits, and a friend had a new baby and there were issues, but all is well now, I had to go over to the next town in our county to renew my driver's license, since it's been 12 YEARS LOL since I had gone in and took a new photo etc, I had to physically go in this time to renew it. That took forever; although I must say the system now is better than it used to be. Then I had another friend with problems, and was trying to find some help for her, along with my own other stuff, cutting tree limbs, and I've got to get to the market today, but I have not had time to clean my house like it needs, and then I have to take a shower, and it's so pretty outside, I need about "5 of me cloned" so I can do 20 things at once!!!! I have not felt that great yet either. In fact, I have not started my RA meds yet, since being ill with the sinus infection. For some reason, I was running a fever, low grade, but still a fever Monday. 

I went in for my pain pump to be refilled, and when they checked it, sure enough I had a low grade temp. I came home and checked it myself, and I was still running a bit of one. I didn't run any fever at all with the sinus infection. Plus, I have kind of "stopped" running a low grade temp with the Lupus. Used to I seemed to almost have a low grade one daily with the Lupus. It went back down and as far as I know has been back to normal the past couple of days. But, I was concerned so I still kept off the Actemra and the new Xeljanz, until I could see what the temp was all about. But, I've had a damned headache, and a bad one at times, for the entire week! IT could be "stress" or maybe I have a Lupus flare, that will give me a Lupus Migraine from hell at times. 

So, yesterday I "almost" went BACK for a 4th time since the 1st part of January and had them give me a prednisone injection for the headache. But, I toughed it out yesterday, and it is not so bad so far this morning. So, it could be anything causing it. With everything going on, as I said I could be more "stressed" out than I think and it's causing the headache. Usually I don't have one that bad. 

When they are bad enough I want to scream and cry, usually it's due to a Lupus flare, or I am sick with something. So, I am going to take the Actemra later this evening and then take my 1st Xeljanz tomorrow and see how things go. Please keep me and those couple of people in your prayers, with problems and the young woman with a new little baby girl. She needs lots of prayers, so she can get her life together, and get back on her feet. The very "odd" thing is, lately, I know of about 4 people, that have someone in their lives in the same situation. The nurse that comes to see me weekly from my insurance, is helping a young woman with kids, and her trying to get her "stuff" together, and the young woman I know. Then my daughter also knows a young woman going through about the same situation, and I have another friend that has a daughter who is really trying to get her life on tract, get a job, her own place to live, and put herself back on the right roads.0 

These young women ALL need our prayers. It seems that many of them at about 25 years old, either get involved with the "wrong crowd", have a child or children, either the Dad is not there or does not help out, and they are desperately trying to dig their way into a 2nd chance. But, that is hard to do... it's hard to get any assistance these days, it takes so much time, paperwork, and red tape. Then of course we have some that have "abused" it, so that makes the ones that really WOULD benefit and try to do right unable to get the help they need. So, something about that age group, some between about 24 to even 32 or so, really lots of young women out there with the same problems... and NO PARENTS, that either will help, or are even around to help.... it sucks, and i AM SO PROUD THAT BOTH OF MY ADULT KIDS ARE IN A PRETTY GOOD SPOT, AND HAVE THEIR HEAD ON THEIR SHOULDERS RIGHT! :) For that I am BLESSED AND GRATEFUL FOR SURE!!!! Have a good weekend everyone!

Rheumatologist visit went well, start Enbrel when insurance approves it, still pissed at Congress, dealing with severe pain in many joints & trying to get the word out for everyone to write Congress & let them know about the business of insurance, cutting "entitlements" and more...

I had a very "good" visit with my PA yesterday at my Rheumatologist office. She FINALLY BELIEVED AND SAW JUST HOW SEVERE my RA has gotten since September last year. She immediately saw the severe swelling and inflammation in 16 of my JOINTS! 

 

I also have "synovitis" in between several of my finger joints on my right hand, swelling in my ankle is somewhat from the RA, and the stiffness, weakness in both hands, my ankles, hips, feet all related in some way to the RA and Lupus. She has put me on Enbrel. She felt the Xeljanz would not "touch" the severity of the RA now. She said if the Enbrel worked somewhat in about 8 weeks or so, she may consider putting me also on the Xeljanz also, to help the Enbrel. She said we would "try" to get me off the daily Prednisone, due to my osteoporosis being so bad, and she agreed it probably has something to do with my fractures of my hip. My Orthopedic surgeon said the same and so did my PCP. They felt although the fall was very hard on that hip that I may not have had a fracture if I had not had the severe osteoporosis that I do. 

 

I see my Cardiologist next week, and if she says it is okay for me to be put back on one of the pills for osteoporosis, although mine is already severe, it "may" help to protect me from just having a joint "break first" then me fall. That happens at times with severe osteoporosis. It happened to my Grandmother. She did not fall 1st then her hip break. It broke and then she fell. My parents next door neighbor also had that happen. She was just walking down the hallway in her home, and her hip broke. So, thus the reason for trying to get me off the Prednisone and hopefully on one of the pills, like Fosamax. I cannot have the injections again. 

 

Once you have those for a few years, due to the other issues that can cause, with a particular type of complicated femur break, I would have to just go on the pills instead. I see my orthopedic surgeon next Monday to hopefully begin getting me prepared and okayed by my insurance for my neck surgery. I am in so much pain, honestly all over, I can barely stand to move, yet if I sit for just a bit, then I am so stiff, I can barely get up and try to walk. So, it's damned if I do and damned if I don't. Plus now not only am I fighting those damned red "paper wasps" already, but the yellow jackets, and last night those damned "salamanders" showed their asses on my porch. I happened to have my fly swatter and knocked the hell out of him. Hopefully that is one less, it was a grown one so those are the ones that can breed the little devils that can breed in dozens very quickly. Then the gnats are nuts, the "May flies" are crazy, fire ants... dammit without any "winter weather" all of the "bugs" are just everywhere. We still don't know what this "bite looking rash" is... she thinks maybe some type of dermatitis, but I still think it is shingles... just not as strong of a case of them due to the Valtrex, which she said they do use for the shingles. I hope the insurance approves the Enbrel quickly and gets it out to me... I am in such severe pain, it is horrible....

These are the very issues, like insurance and the Enbrel, and "cutting things like Medicaid and other entitlements to those who need the insurance so badly due to severe and chronic illnesses, many that need expensive medications and continued medical care that means "Specialists". We also NEED the NIH to be able to have funds to continue research on so many illnesses... things are just a damned mess with our government and only us, the PEOPLE can do something about it!

Finding some kind of "Quiet" in all of the Chaotic Realms of my Own Daily Life, what I want, what I need to do, and why I am NOT doing some of the things I think I "want" to do... as I said "chaotic"

If I sound "off" today, I feel "off".... I've been having so many nightmares, or just plain terrible dreams, I even began waking myself up and writing them down... and my sleep is all off schedule... I get up way earlier than I had been, and by the time 9PM comes around, I am ready to lay down. I try to watch a movie, and sometimes I do, other times I wake up and the movie is over, and the TV is still on... and the weather is really messing with me... although it is warm here, our humidity levels are so high, it appears as if it has rained, and I even Peanut acting a bit "off" ... we did have a full moon, but this has been going on now with me for several weeks. I "think" I am just sick of being in the house so much, and although I have a billion things I can do, for the most part, I just cannot get motivated enough to do them. I've thought it was my diet, so I went back to eating breakfast earlier, like I did while in the hospital...

 so I try to eat by about 8:30AM or so, but then by 2PM, which is too late to eat "lunch" because I eat dinner by about 5:45 for the most part, so I even made some of my own homemade granola... I have to get more stuff to go into it, but it turned out good, and this way I can keep out the nuts and stuff that my dentures just cannot take... I bought some "trail mix" and they have whole almonds in it, and even when I chopped them up more, I still cannot chew or bite on an almond, they are just too hard, and oddly enough, I like the "flavor" of almonds, but I am not crazy about the nuts themselves... I love walnuts, and they are a bit less hard, but I realized while I was looking for granola recipes, you can even put like Cheerios cereal in it, and other things I had not thought about... I used "brown sugar Splenda" in it and a little bit of honey... then put my favorite spices, allspice, cinnamon, cardamon, ginger, and nutmeg... 

and I had a few dried dates, and I took the dried cranberries out of the trail mix, and they had some dried cherries in it... plus I put coconut in it before I put it in the oven... I want to get it a bit "chunkier" though... so probably more honey or brown sugar, so it will "stick together" a bit more... then I need to grab several of my favorite dried fruits to go in it, and those now are easy to find... anyway, I am just having a tough time trying to figure out where to "stick myself"... I came down with a sore throat the last couple of days, and I know everywhere in Ennis I go people are coughing and sneezing, and hoarse, and the flu, and some other viral stuff is going around, plus lots of people are suffering from pneumonia, which I HOPE that new vaccine I took early in the fall helps to keep me away from the pneumonia.. I had it like 2 or 3 years in a row, twice in both lungs, so I don't want any of that if I can stay the heck well. Besides if I come down with something like that it delays my possible new RA medication, and/or my neck surgery... and then this morning, for some odd reason, I was getting up off the sofa, and "hit" the nerve I guess going down my left leg...

 I NEVER usually have issues with that side, but it burned and stung like I was on fire... so I am not sure, if I happened to have "rolled" on it getting up or if my lower back is acting up, but this time on my left side... when I've had kidney stones, my left side usually hurts worse than the right. So, I first thought oh crap, not a kidney stone... but it is more I think all weather related... my hip and right leg have hurt now for about 3 days or so... I even have been getting Peanut on his leash, and the days it is nice outside, we walk 4 or 5 times during the day.... he loves it ... and he got upset with me this morning. I had to go around to the back and get one of the smaller tree limbs that I need to get into the trash, plus I had a whole trash can full of limbs and tomorrow is trash day. I always try and bring the cans up to the side of my house, especially if we have bad weather, so I don't have to go around to the back if it is rainy or cold... so he was upset. I could not hold his leash, and try and bring the limb and the can up to the front... but I had him out for a little while to pick up the newspapers, and it is still damp outside... I figure it will either "cure me" or "kill me: as the saying goes, to get out and walk around for a bit...

 I've got fire ants coming out again, so it is time to get the fire any granules out, but also time to spread the granules out I buy for spring and summer. I have to do it early as of now, since we have basically not "had any real winter weather yet" so the bugs, ants, and every other kind of insect, fleas, will be in the yard if I don't get them under control BEFORE they start.. Anyway, Lots of things I could do, and I need a cabinet, preferably with doors on it. I want to take all of my tools and such I have on two tables in my back bedroom, and get them organized into the cabinet, and off those tables... The room is a damned mess... and although it is my own "controlled chaos" (I KNOW where everything is) still it looks horrible, and I've got to go through some boxes of stuff and throw away some things... but I have so many "hand tools" like pliers, screwdrivers, my cordless drills, and nails and the list of "things" I keep and need the small stuff, just needs to be organized, and put away neatly so I can get that room painted, and get the window repaired that is still broken from hail over 2 YEARS ago,...

 I fear anytime one of these bad winds will come, and it will knock out my "duct taped" window, and I will be up the creek - and mad because I have not fixed it yet... so I have MANY PROJECTS, like my writing, around the house, my advocacy stuff, and my lists go on and on, but my "motivation" is lacking right now.... I just cannot stand to "feel this way"... like I am kind of "lost" in my own sea of "stuff" and can't find which way to get my bearings and "sail" the path that I 1st need to, then go from there... I SWORE TO MYSELF after I got home from the hip fractures, I WOULD WRITE THIS NEXT BOOK... yet I continue to "not be able" to "begin" ... I almost feel like starting at the "back of the book" and work forward, rather than beginning and then coming to an end... the "latest" things to go in there are very fresh in my mind, thus the other stuff is already written down, but i must wade through all of it, and get it in some type of organized chaos, so it will half-assed make sense to whomever reads it...

 I have my drums and keyboard, BUT the right leg, will be the one along with the right foot for the bass... and the type of exercise I would get from "banging" on the drums maybe actually good for my hip and foot... it may help to strengthen those muscles both in my upper leg and in the foot also... My crap with the writing also has to do with my shoulder, and neck... and actually my lower back also, and might as well admit it my hands and wrists... When I sit here for very long, typing etc. my shoulders, neck, wrists, fingers and lower back begin to just burn... from the impinged nerves... and now the RA has gotten to the place my thumbs, wrists, and portions between my fingers are swollen, and stiff and it hurts to type for very long... I THINK IT IS TIME FOR ME TO GET THE HECK OUT OF THE HOUSE OVERNIGHT, THEN GET MY NEW PUPPY... AND try to take all of the chaotic crap, I "feel" I need to do, and sit down to re-organize my priorities again... I've drifted again between those things I "want" to do, and those things I feel I NEED to do... and what lies in between is a bunch of stuff, that keeps me in knots half the time....

Necrotizing Myopathy: Are Statins to Blame? Article from Med Page Today! Something you may need to know more about... "Muscle Pain"? Not sure why? On a "statin"?? This maybe the answer...

 

This is very similar to what I went through a couple of years ago. I was on a statin, NOT for cholesterol issues. But, a statin, a small dose of blood pressure medication, and Lasix has became a "norm" for many who suffer a heart attack. IT seem the combination help to lessen chances of another MI. But, when I went in with severe muscle pain, especially in my calves... plus fatigue, weakness, and so forth, my PCP checked to see what my levels were to make sure I was not suffering not just from Myopathy, but worse, it can turn into Rhabdomyolysis. plus due to the fact that I also suddenly had double vision which grew worse as the days went by, my blood tests confirmed I had "muscle damage" in my blood. Much like the "enzymes" they look for immediately when the suspect an MI, also basically the same he found those enzymes and I should have not had any. Of course my situation was even more complex. I already had 2 "heart attacks" not just one. So, it was even more important to try and do any and everything to NOT risk another. Yet, the myopathy can be dangerous.... and it can cause permanent damage if left unchecked... so I had to go off the station for 3 months, or until my blood work showed NO muscle damage. So, just like "Prednisone" as my PCP calls it for me a "necessary evil"... without it, I honestly think I maybe unable do do much of anything. It helps to keep the severe inflammation down, but also again in turn, now I have severe osteoporosis due to the Prednisone and I am also "pre-destined" to have it due to genetic reasons and even the AI illnesses. Seeing this article once again brings to mind HOW MANY COMPLICATIONS, other illnesses in "tandem"... the meds and their side effects... all come with Autoimmune Illnesses, and arthritic illnesses, and many other chronic diseases, such as FM,CFS/ME and MANY others.... as PATIENTS so MATTER "what" a doctor might "tell me" I AM STILL going to be an EDUCATED patient~~~ I thoroughly believe some of my treatments, and even maybe some of my diagnosis, would NOT be right.... had I NOT became an EMPOWERED and EDUCATED Patient! I also know there is LOTS and LOTS of "bogus" material out there in the WWW... so you truly have to be diligent when it comes to what you think is accurate... but I NEVER hesitate... IF I Read, or see something online I feel "maybe" something my doctor had missed or not thought about and so forth... I PRINT IT, TAKE IT and Ask him to either allow me to ask questions, or let him read it.... or us just discuss the "main" issue whatever I bring in maybe relative to my situation.... of course I AM NO DOCTOR and by NO MEANS think I "know it all" ... YET, when it comes to OUR BODIES most of us especially women KNOW things very well..... Sometime I feel as if I am "educating" my doctors, and sometimes they tell me, that I am helping to bring new light to the subject.

http://www.medpagetoday.com/Rheumatology/GeneralRheumatology/52416?xid=nl_mpt_DHE_2015-07-03&eun=g773630d0r

I am here still with the Flares, and more... Lupus. RA, Xeljanz, insurance, and Chronic Illnesses and Pain

 I 've added 3 photo's of what the side on my right knee looks like now.

I thought I should post, so everyone would not think I had up and disappeared! LOL!!! I would imagine "some" people could care less if I disappeared forever and to eternity! ;)  But, that is another very LONG story for another TIME when I feel I can "blog" a bit more as far as my own situation goes. For now, first of all, I am thrilled to be helping WEGO on several projects. I also am of course continuing my Platinum Ambassador activism. I also of course also post, blog, and so on about other chronic illnesses, and chronic pain. My pain level has been out the roof! Yet, I realize that others are either as bad as I am, OR possibly worse. I have been just as busy as a bee with things here at home. From taking down old desks, cleaning closets and dresser drawers, sanding on the inside windows in the spare room... to getting rid of LOADS of things that either have not been used in eons, never will be, are probably to old to use, and things that are generally worn out. I HATE a home full of "stuff" that is just that, stuff. So, I am pairing down a great deal of everything in each and every nook and cranny of this house. I am also in the process of finding my Mom an Orthopedic doctor. She has got to have her hip seen about. It is to the point that even Mobic, and it is a strong NSAID is not helping her. She is "still limping that leg and hip. So, it is more than time to have it X-rayed and get a specialist to either give her an injection into that hip, or something needs to be done. Of course my own issues with my hips, both, and lower back are also nuts. I had to POSTPONE the discograph again due to these flares and the "immune" situation for now, especially with prednisone... thus I am GOING to have that done a week from today on the 22nd... and I hope this time I can get there, and get it over with. I am ready (well no one is ever ready) to discuss "what" needs to be done, not done, and how to deal with the ordeal. I have to get a huge amount of blood work done, especially the "TB Gold" test, before my insurance will think about covering Xeljanz. So, I will go in later in the week to get that done. Then if the insurance will okay it, I will be trying the Xeljanz for the RA etc. I know I had a couple other things to "say" but now I cannot remember them... alas brain fog... ;)

Round Two of Bad Weather (I can tell from my severe pain), Lupus, RA, Flares, MORE unbearable pain, Discographs, Ankylosing Spondylitis & More

Looks like Round 2 of the BAD Weather days for my area around the DFW Metroplex, including Ellis County. It is supposed to start out as rain possibly today, but then turn back into Thunderstorms for several days through the weekend and more... so we shall see. I am supposed to go for that discograph on Monday, But, due to having this corticosteroid injection and having both I think a Lupus and RA flare at the same time, and now I am on a step down large dose of Prednisone for about 7 days or so. I am not sure they will even consider doing the procedure. Since they have to inject dye into my spine, and we run the risk of infection even with antibiotics they will give me IV during the procedure, my immune system is not probably really ready to handle it. I am calling them today and talking to them about it before I even try to go up to Dallas early Monday morning. No use in my son nor I making that trip only to have them tell me I can't have it done right now. Also I did find out my PCP will do all of the blood work my Rheumy wants me to have. I'll go in next week and have it and what my PCP wants done all at the same time. I am sure the lab tech will be thrilled! He cringes when he sees me coming. I am such a horrible stick, due to rolling veins, tiny veins, the "blow" on them, they have to "chase them down, anyway... he just looks like he wants to cry as I walk in the door. But, it all has to be done, thus he will have to stick as much as it takes to get the blood needed for the tests. They are also checking for that "marker" for AS (ankylosing spondylitis) HLA-B27... a "genetic marker" that sometimes shows with this autoimmune disorder. From what I read, lots of people can have the "marker" yet never get the AI. Then many can have AS, yet the marker does not show. Yet, my latest symptoms, with the very severe lower lumbar and sacral L-5/S-1 back pain, down into my hips, that almost keeps me from being able to sit at my computer for very long at a time... I just have all of the hallmark symptoms of the disease. Now it may show I have a compression fracture due to the osteoporosis, the reason for this discograph... I don't care what it is, fix it so I can go back to somewhat of whatever "normal" in my life is anymore. Now, that I am basically here with me and the pups, I have LOTS of stuff I want to do at the house.... but in the pain I've been in, I just am almost in tears by the time I sit here for 10 minutes... So, I do need the discograph done, but even my pain doctor, thinks it is a waste of time and money.. it appears I have something that needs to be fixed in that area, so even if we find the AS is present, then I still will probably be having lower surgery on those places on my very lower spine... My hips hurt so badly, even this morning by 3 am I was awake from pain so severe I wanted to scream.... so let's hope they find something and can do something about it....

As you can see again I'm going through hell with the AI issues. Some days just trying to ignore the pain, the inflammation, stiffness, and go ahead with all of my house projects work... and then others the Rheumatoid Arthritis, the Lupus, and now possibly Ankylosing Spondylitis, and more just about get the best of me. I am attaching a couple of links about AS, for those who want to know more, as well as about the discograph... and so forth. 

I need to try and get to work on my 3rd book on my own history and river of "fun" with Autoimmune Illnesses, and I intend to soon, if I can get to where I can sit long enough to do so. I have almost finished reading Stephen King's book "On Writing". He has some incredible ideas, and of course many I already know. I need a complete "block of time" even if that means weeks, to just write! Nothing else, if I can help it, but quiet time, where I can "bust out" the rest of the writing, then I can begin editing, proofing and so forth. I have no change but to do it all myself. I cannot afford to have a professional help with it, and I did a pretty darn good job with my 1st two books.

This 3rd on of course is so much different. It will be a compilation of my blog posts, my writing about these AI illnesses, and all of the other complications that go along with them... and my personal story, both glory and Lord awful times when I thought not being on this Earth would be better than all I've endured over this past many years... especially since 2005 forward. 

I know I need to get it out there for others to read, and hopefully show that they too can share their problems... people out there do care, even when you think they don't. 

So, as the days go by, keep me in your thoughts... lots of stuff going on with me right now. Some I cannot speak about much until later when things are more settled. 

As time goes on, I will be able to give more details about my life, and what is, is not, and what will go on, for my future. Of course, as I've found out through personal experience, as well as through the experiences of some of my friends especially on Facebook, we are never "guaranteed", what the future will hold. I was thinking about that just a bit ago while I was in the kitchen. In 2010, on Feb. 2nd, which would have been my Dad's birthday, I went to the ER via ambulance, sicker than I can remember... they thought it was my Gallbladder. Well, it came out, and I appeared to be getting better. Yet, within 10 hours or so, I was so ill, they feared I may not pull through. They rushed me via ambulance to Methodist in Dallas, where I stayed 6 weeks. They told us I had a "collapsed" bile duct, that my liver had a nick on it, from the surgery and it was pouring "poison" into my abdomen. I had tubes of stuff coming out of me for weeks and weeks. I didn't even get them out until much later after I came home. Honestly, I don't think they really ever knew what was wrong exactly. I was told by all of my physicians, including my PCP, they thought I would frankly, die... although I am still here, but it was a scary, very long 4 months or even more before I felt like I truly may live. I could not eat nor drink for something like 6 weeks. They fed me via IV the entire time... so we never know... a guy I know that was the "picture of health" in his mid 40's, was found by his wife on the floor when she got home from errands. He had a massive brain bleed. Turned out after having to remove a part of his skull to relieve the pressure, he had had a stroke... and maybe unable to move on his entire right side the rest of his life.

I just read where a friend on Facebook who has "RSD", and I don't know a lot about it, although I do know some... she is very young, and facing having her arm amputated today! It appears where blood may not get to certain areas due to nerve issues, thus it appears like she has the massive sores like an infection on her lower arm. So, they are taking her arm off partially it appears down below the elbow.

Another friend here I went to school with is battling cancer. She had it when we were still in high school! And she kicked its butt. Now, after over 30 plus years, it is back, and she is fighting daily with pain, from a tumor that is pressing on her sciatic nerve. 

That is just a few I can think of... My Dad basically went like of like that... had a knee replacement, and something just went terribly wrong... and he passed away in the hospital.... so we never know, from moment to moment what may happen...


The accident Jim had last year March 2014, who would have known an 18 wheel tractor trailer would have ran him over and now he is partially paralized from about his mid-chest down. 

Those again are just a few that I can think of now, and there are so many more of us that either have suffered like that, or know of dear family or friends, that within a breaths space... have gone through horrid and almost unbelievable health experiences. 


RSD - http://rsds.org/



Ankylosing Spondylitis -   (AS)
http://www.spondylitis.org/about/as.aspx




 

The Ever Spinning World of Lupus, RA, Sjogren's and All of the Hectic Life Things to be Done

Today, like many others I have so many decisions to make, things to do or not do and put off, things I want to do, albeit before our weather goes to heck in a hand basket as the saying goes, and so forth.

I feel here it is another Friday, the weekend almost here... by the way
                     HAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY TO ALL TOMORROW!

Hope you and your sweetheart have a wonderful day! Even if at the moment you may not have someone special to share the day with, share it with yourself and do something nice for YOU!

I have just found out that I have an opportunity to meet several of the ladies of the IFAA that I am also an Active Volunteer!They are going to DC also the same time I am for another non-profit. So, we are thinking rather than me fly out on Tuesday, which was going to be hard on me anyway by the time I land back in Dallas, then drive 70 miles home, and it will be around 10 pm ... and my night vision is not all that great. So, I could be more rested, plus come back earlier in the daytime, just after rush hour, so that would be awesome also!!! So, that is one of my decisions and I really need to make the change TODAY as far as my flight. We were thinking about going to the Casino on Sunday and maybe even spend the night. But, the weather is supposed to be just hideous. 100% chance of rain all the way there, and then even if we spent the night, the same on Monday. So, we may postpone that and go the following weekend, although it does not look much better right now.

I wanted to stay here at home today, and in fact gave up a chance to go ahead and have my hair trimmed, but I was a bit worn out, plus have my head spinning in about 30 directions. I NEED to begin getting more and more writing on my book completed. It seems there is something everyday that takes my mind away, so I am either gone physically doing something or I am mentally too tired by the time I can even get to the computer.

So, life goes on and on...  here is a post from Facebook I wrote talking about time, and just how quickly it passes you by....

Before things get to hectic! I have about 25 "irons in the fire" right now!:) I wanted to wish everyone a very nice Valentine's Day tomorrow! I happened to have "almost" been a Valentine's Baby. My birthday is Sunday on the 15th! Not really loving the fact I am "half-way" to 60... yuck that sounds old! Yet, I feel my "work" here is not completed thus I must accept the fact, the only way to be "here" on Earth and do what I love is to try my best to accept that each year will make me a bit older. I also hope that in with that age, I continue to "learn something new" every day, and my hopes are that I will be able to somewhat have a bit relief with the right medications from the Lupus, RA, Sjogren's and so forth. Even if it means surgery down the road on a couple of joints, if it keeps me up and on my feet, then I will be a happy camper. These years seem to have just flown by too quickly. Jim & I celebrate 10 years of marriage in April! It seems like yesterday we met on Alki across from Seattle, overlooking the "Sound" and all of the beauty that is there. I still miss it and always will. I seemed to be "healthier" there than any other place I've been to. Not sure if that was due to the weather and climate, or if I just had not gotten into the horrid symptoms of the autoimmune illnesses. Unfortunately, I had lost my job, right after Jim and I met. Actually I resigned. And that was really due to ongoing health problems, mainly Migraines and severe conjunctivitis. I could not get rid of the eye problems. Each time I would heal up, in a couple of days it would re-appear, and since it is so contagious, plus I would not have been able to do the type of work I was doing at the bank there, I began to miss lots of work due to health. Honestly, it was the STRESS of that job, and the two "supervisors" who were "witches" and that is putting it mildly. The stress each day of dealing with those two, along with the tedious realms of dealing with Real Estate Files, and all of the paperwork in them, the job was very, very stressful without having to deal with two backstabbing, back biting, lying women. They had been "friends" for many years, and had both worked there many years, thus they spent their time covering one another's butts... But that is past, I am back in TX now, in my hometown... and I've let go of the anger and bitterness that I first had right after having to resign. Later, in fact, I've become online friends with one of them. She was my direct supervisor, and since then she had a very bad car accident and bless her heart, dealing with lots of pain from the accident.... and the bank actually closed since I left I found out. Anyway, time has gone by much too quickly. My 1st Grandson was only about 5 weeks old when we arrived back here. He and now his younger brother are both in school. When I think about just how quickly life passes us by, it makes me want to make sure those I love, and I care for dearly, whether family, spouse, and friends... that I let them know. So, if you have a "special someone" then I wish you a very beautiful Valentine's Day together. If you are alone right now, then do something very special for yourself tomorrow!!! You can "love" yourself and show how much you do. Whether that means a special cup of coffee, a walk if it is pretty, buying that "something" that you've wanted and so forth... Enjoy! Don't let life pass you by.... as one of the songs in the country songs lists.... "No Time to Kill" by Clint Black... and then another one is about how quickly your child grows up, becomes a parent themselves, and goes on to have their own family, all within a breath's space... in the blink of a eye... time can pass you by... and as my favorite saying out of a song in fact goes... (the chorus that reads "When They Carve My Stone All They Need to Write on it... Living in A Moment You Would Die For" that is what I want on my Head Stone someday - the chorus of this song....
sung by

Ty Herndon

Living in A Moment

Well the world just lost two lonely people
The world just lost two broken hearts
The odds were against it but baby here we are
In our own little place in our own little corner
This old cold world just got a little warmer
For the rest of my life I'm gonna hold you in my arms
And when they carve my stone all they'll need to write on it
Is 'Once lived a man who got all he ever wanted'
Tell me something, who could ask for more?
Than to be living in a moment you would die for
If you never get rich on what money can buy
It don't matter to me, I'll tell you why
I've got it all when I'm holding you this way
I'll live to love you, I'd die to keep you
Safe inside these arms that need you
I'll be loving you with the very last breath I take
And when they carve my stone all they'll need to write on it
Is 'Once lived a man who got all he ever wanted'
Tell me something, who could ask for more?
Than to be living in a moment you would die for
Ashes to ashes
Dust into dust
I'll lay beside you
Forever in love
And when they carve my stone all they'll need to write on it
Is 'Once lived a man who got all he ever wanted'
Tell me something, who could ask for more?
Than to be living in a moment, loving every minute
Tell me something, who could ask for more?
Than to be living in a moment you would die for
Living in a moment you would die for
Oh baby, I'm living in a moment I would die for
Oh, living in a moment I would die for