Showing posts with label small towns. Show all posts
Showing posts with label small towns. Show all posts

Monday, May 2, 2016

Hopping Over the Hurdles of a small town, with no shuttle to Dallas to get there for surgery more on the Horrors of Dementia & A Parent

This may sound like a ridiculous question to many people, but what do people do like myself, that live in a small town, and have no really "close" relatives, and need to be taken to somewhere like Dallas to have surgery, or a procedure done, yet they don't have a "spouse", or anyone they can call upon to do so? Sure, if I lived in Dallas, I could probably find some type of shuttle service, or at the very least take a Taxi, etc.... but unless I am just not informed, I gather there is no type of shuttle here in our community that does that type of thing? So, are there people out there that will do something such as that, drive a person for a day surgery, or for a test of some type, or to a doctors office, that for some reason they are not able to drive themselves? We must have someone around here that does that and charges a certain amount to take you and bring you back home. My son can't get off work, due to him having been off himself for an arm injury so he can't get off this next week on Wednesday, of course my daughter is 8 hours away, my Mom, well even if she was OKAY, Mom could not even drive me across town when I had double pneumonia a couple of years ago to Urgent Care...

I was "too sick" to drive alone, so she came over, and I had to drive us there, and then drive myself back home, and I have no other "relatives" or people that can do something such as that. I guess it would be something someone in our area should consider. Because there has to be more people than myself that wind up in this situation. And of course even if I "felt like" I could drive home, there is no way, no how my surgeon would ever, every agree to that, especially it being neck surgery, and I will have a cervical collar on... Any thoughts from any of you? I know there is "Uber" in the larger cities, but I am sure we don't have anyone here that would drive anyone from Ennis to Dallas and then back to Ennis.... I've just about taken all I can...

I've put this surgery off, and thus that means my lower surgery has been put off also, and now my fingers are numb all the time, I can barely turn my head, and my lower back and legs continue to hurt like hell... I guess I am going to have to go and have my pain pump medication increased, which I did not want to do.... and then like today, I go to the market for Mom, I take food over for her to choose what she can eat, well, she never said a word, just mumbled a couple of times, "nothing" I guess it what she said... so I put stuff up, cleaned out the fridge, took out the trash, put up the clothes in the dryer, happened to have ran into the gentleman that does my Mom's lawn work, and found out she did no pay him from last time, so I told him to go ahead and cut the yard again, and I had to pay him for that... then I had to fold laundry, get her medications together for the next week, pick up her scripts from the pharmacy, clean up what she had left out give her a new glass of something to drink, take her an Ensure that was cold, and by that time, I went in 3 or 4 times, and she never said a word...

I had asked like 3 or 4 times about eating... so when I finished, I gathered up my stuff, and just came home. I am totally exhausted, and I got to thinking, I am a main, a cook, a grocery shopper, a car detailer, a trash person, I do laundry, I "exterminate" for ants, I vacuum, dust, sweep, fix her meds, make sure she takes her meds ... and the list just goes on and on,.. a bill payer... an accountant... chief, cook and bottle washer... and you know what... I am totally exhausted.... so I am headed to the sofa to watch a movie, and then will get dinner ready here in a bit... I am just so disenchanted with it all... and I "watch" and see everyone else "living their lives"... and mine seems to "not be of my own"....


Alas, I am just going to have to postpone it again, and I know my Orthopedics Surgeon's office is going to throw a fit. I've had to postpone it twice myself already, and he postponed it once due to some thing that came up for him. So, they also at times suddenly postpone at the last minute. But, I am just going to have to let his assistant know that this time rather than trying to "reschedule" in a month or two weeks etc... to wait, and I will call them back to reschedule once I can "set in stone" find someone to take me to have the surgery and bring me back. I do not want to do this again. It is difficult on them, and it is difficult on me, to feel "rushed and in a panic trying to find someone"...I even looked up in our area some type of "shuttle" service that may take me up there. I know my neighbor across the street goes in a shuttle frequently, but she is on dialysis, and I think they may take her to Dallas, but just a certain area. 

The only one here I can find, just does a shuttle in our county, and if I lived up in DeSoto or in that area, then the Star Transit could take me, but that is about 20 miles away... Anyway, I am going to have to make some very difficult decisions this week about Mother anyway. I am sick this morning, and the weather here is horrible. We were supposed to be "sunny" and no chance of rain... LOL... what a joke, the thunder and lightening woke me up around 6AM, and it is raining, and we have an electrical storm over us still. It is just a terrible day out there right now... I had to get the trash out to the curb and I HATE LIGHTENING... it struck my car one year while we were driving in an unexpected storm on a major highway, and it hit the antenna of our car, knocked it off and it literally FLEW over an 18 wheel tractor trailer, and it "stopped" the brain of my car! We were in a brand new car with dealer plates still on it! 

But it "reset" itself after about 15 minutes or so on the side of the road, but that was one of those "spring storms" that came up so suddenly we did not even have time to find shelter... we were fortunate enough to get under on overpass and had a truck driver in front of us and in back of us... and a tornado literally passed within a quarter mile or less right in front of us over the highway!!!! Cars were stopped for miles on both sides of I-35! It was a total nightmare! So, I am not a "fan" of any type of electrical storm or hail. I've had a roof ruined by that, windows knocked out in fact I still have a window that desperately needs to be replaced because it is just barely holding in with cardboard and duct tape now! But, I need someone to help hold the pane in place so I can get the "pins" in it to hold the glass in so I can put the glazing around it.... so again, until I can find someone to help, I am "SOL" as the saying goes....

 I was so totally upset over this past weekend, between Mom and some of the crap she pulled and said to me, and between not having any way to get to have my surgery, and my neck is getting worse... yesterday my fingers went to "sleep" on both hands and were burning and stinging, then by the time I got through the market, and got what I needed and picked up Mom's stuff, hauled it in her house, put that away, folded clothes and done everything there, put all of her trash out etc... then came home and had to put all of my stuff up, my hips and legs hurt so badly I wanted to cry! Now this morning, I woke up with a sore throat, and my glands are swollen under my neck worse on the left side... so I hope I don't have another infection...

I went over there this morning. She was "up" standing in her living room. No cane, no walker, and no emergency cell phone on her... so if she fell, there would be no way for her to contact me or anyone. So, I asked her what she was doing... and she mumbled "straightening" things up... and I just commented, well Mom everything should be pretty well straight.Then I went through the "laundry" list of things I did. I asked her if she had eaten... her reply of course was "No"... I went to put up some drinks I had gotten her, and there were items again in the fridge that did not belong, and she was just "fiddling" around with things, not really doing anything. 

I went and got her medication, put it in a small little cup, laid it on the table, and mentioned she did not eat yesterday and she replied, NO one brought me anything!...Okay, there I had been there the day before, brought in all of the groceries, asked her numerous times to eat or what she wanted, and I either got no reply or just a "no"... so I explained that I did come, and she did not want to eat, and she said I don't recall anyone being here... and I could tell, she was in "one of those moods"... so I finished putting up the drinks, and told her, her medications were on the table... and I said I see you must have things under control, so I am going home... and she looked at me and said. YOU have NO HOME!!

 I TURNED and replied Well, I guess I do, and that is exactly where I am headed... call me if you need anything. So, I shut the door and left. I am not feeling well today, I woke up with swollen glands under my neck, and a sore throat and the weather is cool today, and I was not about to stand there and allow her to "belittle" all of what I've done, since she just cannot recall what those things are... I called off my surgery and will reschedule a bit later in a month or so, once some things are not so messed up... but for now, as I told my doctor's assistant, until I can get a firm "way" there and back to Dallas for the surgery, and get someone to watch after Mom or see where all of this goes in the coming weeks, I did not want to reschedule, and then find out something is amiss again... Anyway, I am headed for the sofa... I just don't feel very well, and I just need the rest. I sure as heck cannot afford to come down with a "flare" or some type of infection right now.



Tuesday, January 20, 2015

"Autoimmune Epilepsy"? - Stiffness Onset, feeling severe fatigue, headache? What is it?

I had an "episode" last Friday. It is something I had experienced perhaps 2 or 3 times in my life that I can recall. But, never like I did this time. It was early, and I was getting out of my computer chair, and began to yawn.... but then my entire body became "stiff"... like every muscle "locked down" and the more I tried to stretch out, the worse it seemed to be stiff. 

I had originally posted my "episode" on Facebook. I've got to get out of the habit of posting there, when I have LOTS to say. I need to post here first, then put only a "bit" on Facebook with a link to my blog.... thus here is the post and more about this "Autoimmune Epilepsy" information I have came into as I did some research... And of course, I am "under the weather"... or not feeling well at all. I've got some kind of stomach mess going I guess. I was having issues yesterday with this very strange "yawning" episode ordeal. It's been a long time since I've had it happen. I would yawn and it was like all of my "muscles" in my body would almost "lock" as I tried to stretch. I can't really explain it, but I guess the feeling would almost be like someone having a "seizure" and all of the muscles get "stiff" and rigid all at once. That is kind of the "feeling" I have with this. I've had it happen before but it as has a long time ago. I already was very fatigued and had a very nauseated stomach early yesterday morning. In fact I took medication for the nausea before it got bad and got on the sofa. And I also ran a low grade fever, like around 99.7 to about 99.9 yesterday all day long, had a severe headache, and my neck muscles are so sore I can barely stand to touch them. Of course every morning when I first get up, I really can't tell how I feel. My feet always hurt so badly, I can't hardly stand to walk on them until I have been up and around for a few hours. Anyway, I think my butt might be back on the sofa today. I am still not feeling "great" at all. Probably a flare, I am going to say. Unless the fever was to get higher than what it had been yesterday, any lower grade fever usually goes with one. And even a low grade fever will make me feel like hell, and give me a bad headache. Anyway, I am still pissed because between the pharmacy and my new insurance they still have my scripts screwed up. I am not sure if either of them know what the hell they are doing. Plus I am already getting letters from the stupid insurance co. wanting my doctor to say "why" I am on one medication rather than what "they" suggest... well in the first place the 3 they suggested are NSAIDS of which I CANNOT TAKE - due to my heart and my stomach, plus what I am on is a muscle relaxer, so why the hell they think a stupid NSAID should be what I am on is beyond my thinking. I can already see it will be hell getting all of this through and over with until I get a fill on ALL of my meds and see what they are going to bitch about, and how many they are going to have the doctors freaking send a form on. It just gripes my butt they feel they know "more" than your doctor!

Anyway, the other funny thing that happened last night! We were watching a movie and all of a sudden my pup, Bubba started barking. Within about 10 seconds we started hearing all of this loud popping, banging, and I could see "colors" through my blinds outside. We ran out the door thinking something was very wrong, and there were fireworks going off left, right and center, right what looked like the middle of our town. We live just a stone's throw away from the main part of town. This went on for about 7 minutes or more. And it began to appear it was on purpose and professional. Lots of dollars of fireworks were going up in the air and it was definitely awesome... except for the smoke trail it left when it was all over with. About that time, the phone rings and I told Jim I bet it is my Mother! Sure enough he answered it and she was all in a tizzy thinking this was happening just a block from her house! LOL!!! Then it dawned on me that I remembered reading something about the City having a parade etc for our High School Football team. They won state here about 3 or so weeks ago, so the city was going to honor them. Sure enough I grabbed the newspaper, and I was right. That was going on right around that time, and I guess was the "finale'" when the parade and so forth was over. OMG, though every neighbor was out, all of Mom's neighbors were all thinking something horrible was happening. But, I don't think they could actually see the fireworks like we could. They are just a bit farther from the main street where it was taking place, plus the trees over there are so tall, I think most of them were only seeing the smoky trail it was making as they went off. Anyway, Jim got her settled down and told her, I had read where they were having that last night, so that is what was happening.... so far no terrorists were shooting off fireworks in our town...LOL... guess not really funny since Lord knows where those freaking nut cases are and what they might do. I think Jim put up the "front page" of the magazine from France the other day and I told him that may not be a great idea.... you never know when those totally insane people might be and what they might do if they find anything to try and pin on any Americans. We all know they absolutely hate us... and we would be "extinct" if they had their way.... just insanity.... so if I am not online much today, it is because I am on the sofa. I just still feel really "off"... everyone else take care and have a good Sunday....(here is a bit more on the subject of the parade and my Mom and her ordeal out if it....

 This just had to be posted... it is funny, but it is also a realization of age, the quickness of times that things change in this world, and how the elderly get so ether corn
And if either of my KIDS tell on me for telling this story about my Mom, I will beat your butts... LOL... but Saturday night they had a parade here in town for our High School Football Team. They won state this year, and they were celebrating 5 State Championship Wins that we have had since 1975... well there had been a couple of articles in our daily paper here about it, and I knew they were going to do the parade. But, I don't think they mentioned anywhere I could find that they were going to put on a "huge fireworks" display as soon as it got dark right after the parade. So Jim and I were watching a movie, and the dogs "heard" something first, and one of them barked a bit. Then we turned the movie volume down and sure enough you could hear this loud "popping" noise almost like gun fire at first. But, we both went outside and saw all of these fireworks going off near down town. We weren't but about 4 or 5 city blocks away, so we could see it over the trees, and it went on for at least 10 minutes or so. We still didn't really know why they had went off, but what did dawn on us, is that it was done "professionally". or the city would have never allowed it to happen. Well, about the time the last one went off my phone rang and I told Jim, I bet it is my Mom... now it still had not really dawned on me about the parade, so neither one of us really knew why they were going off, but it appeared it was done "on purpose", not some accident etc... sure enough my Mom was in a panic... she asked Jim if we heard it and he went in to telling her yes, we did, and yes we saw all the smoke afterward, and about that time then it did dawn on me about the Parade for our Football Team. Sure enough I grabbed the newspaper so I knew that is what it was, even though they had not mentioned the fireworks. As Jim tried to tell Mom what the deal was, she got almost pissed and said why would they fire "fireworks" off right by her house?? And we were puzzled... she thought due to the smoke and the way it came over town and she never saw the fireworks at all. She thought they were doing it right around the corner from her where our old hospital building is.... LOL!!!! Jim was trying to tell her no, they were down in town around the old building and where people who used to work at Ennis Business Forms parked on the "parking lot" right at main street... well she wanted to argue so he just said "okay" and all is fine... and I was indisposed at the moment in the bathroom, so I would talk to her the next day. Well, I go over yesterday, and she said did you see where they were trying to clean all that mess up in front of the old hospital from that fireworks mess??? I almost wanted to tell her to shut up about it, but I explained NO!!!!! it was down by the old Ennis Bus. Forms parking lot, and we saw all of it. What was in that parking lot of the old hospital is a huge dumpster full of junk they have taken out of the old building there, and were using a small bull dozer to dump it into that dumpster... it had NOTHING to do with the parade or fireworks what so ever... and if she had been that way all week last week, she would have seen them cleaning up a bunch of stuff they were hauling out of that building... In fact I had told her twice last week I saw them cleaning out some stuff and wondered if someone finally bought that property... the building is in such an old state and the code violations so many, they really can't "repair" it, it would be cheaper to tear it down, and then rebuild it, because of the shape it is in... anyway, she was still so pissed about the fireworks, and then it was even more funny. I got home, pulled out the newspaper from last Tuesday, and on the FRONT PAGE... a HUGE ARTICLE about the PARADE ON SATURDAY NIGHT for the State Win in Football... but I didn't see anything about the fireworks... so that was kind of an error because with as many elderly people that we have here and especially living relatively close to down town, I am sure many that really don't follow our football team. So with the world in the shape it is in and all of the stuff going on, I do feel they should have definitely put something in about the fireworks and made sure that people knew it was going to happen... like I said we really was not sure at first, until I recalled something about a parade in the paper, and that is when I put it all together... but Mom was still just pissed about it all... she HATES FOOTBALL anyway.... so for her it made no sense at all.... IT was so funny!!!! Just because she was so adamant that I was nuts and it was right by her....LOL!!! and as I said MY KIDS BETTER NOT TELL HER I PUT THIS ON FB!!! 

Now I realize I posted a bit about this a day or two ago... but I didn't get the entire thing in there, thus I wanted to "repost" it with all of the "good stuff" in it.... anyone who knew my Mom would totally "get" why this was so freaking funny... I mean she is getting up in age, and I know there are often things she just does not "get" anymore... and maybe never had honestly. But, when I went back over there yesterday and she was still going on and on about how they should have "never" done that... and how horrible it was and so forth, I just had to post the entire conversations.... so take this multiply it by about 100 times and think of all of the "things" in life, her, like many older citizens just don't get... computers, "automated teller machines", debit cards, washing a car at the car wash, driving in the dark, you name it.... it really at times is almost sad that she is so "frightened" of so much in life.... here this year in August comes her 80th Birthday... seems impossible, yet there is still so much that just either scares her because she has not been exposed to it, or she fears learning anything new, she absolutely does not even know what kind of batteries go in her TV remote, and if I finally get her to write them down. and understand it. Then there is no way she can figure out how to put them in the proper direction.

It just seems so terribly wrong to know she struggles with these things, and without someone right here to help her, there would be a great deal that just would totally be things she never could do herself, or my other fear is her getting taken advantage of, if something needs repair at her house... I have to continually warn her to throw away "junk" mail - stuff like "insurance" for your water pipes, or people calling her all the time about trying to "sell" her something, or get her to change over her "electrical" carrier... they just target and prey on the elderly people knowing so many of them either don't understand or they have no one to "watch out" for them.... it is a totally crazy and insane world we live in. Even myself, especially with some emails, for the most part I can detect a "spam" or some "trap" email that can reek havoc with my computer, etc... yet these "spammers" and others that send out these emails get smarter, more aggressive, yet sloppier all the time. But when you get something and it may refer to one of your credit cards, or a company you may do business with, they can almost make you truly believe it is a "for real" email that is totally critical... so if those of us who "know" and are wise enough to "smell a rat" per se', yet can almost be fooled, then people that aren't as educated, or have not grown up with all we face in the daily realms through this walk of life... then someone has to try and look out for them... I feel for those that don't have anyone... we hear all the time how people get "cheated" out of sometimes their life savings by these bullies out there....