Sunday, September 5, 2010

Confusion and Concerns - any suggestions?

We were planning a trip to Washington DC in October. But I have lots of concerns due to both of us and our health issues. I really need that pain pump done before the 1st of the year, due to my insurance situation. I may have to change insurance at the 1st of the year, and don't know how that might effect me. My pain, plus the Lupus etc is a huge concern for a trip of 10 days, and thousands of miles. But, I also feel he needs to get his stomach checked out. He has been having severe issues with nausea & even sometimes vomiting blood. He gets sick trying to eat. He does not have insurance so we need to get him into the clinic that can take care of this on a sliding fee scale. He has been there before, but he needs to redo paperwork, and it takes awhile to get an appt. & get the tests etc. He also has very bad pain that requires strong pain medication due to his lower back problem. We are worn out when we just take a day or overnight trip to Bossier or the casino in OK. He complains enough that I have to do some of the driving. And that is only a 2 or 3 hour trip & then back. I just don't see us driving 1300 miles one way, and not having major health issues. Plus, we have both of our dogs, that are so used to us, they get upset when we are gone a few hours. When I go into the hospital they lay around and won't eat or drink for days sometimes. We need to take them with us, but my Pug is very prone to motion sickness, and she hates riding. If we leave them, I fear our neighbor kid, even though they are good neighbors may not come in & take care of them, just due to the fact they get all hyped when any one comes in other than us. They jump, bark and just get nuts, because of being used to just him and I, and not really having much company. The little one is very protective & he nips sometimes until he is used to you. I fear the boy might not come around due to all of that & I would never forgive myself if something happened to either him or our puppies. Any one knows when you have a chronic illness or pain, there is lots to consider when taking an extended vacation of any kind. I just feel we should postpone the trip until spring. Save up more money, so we can rent a small motor home, take the dogs, and then we can have more room, I can get my pain pump installed, he can get his stomach looked into... and the trip would be much more pleasant. But, I knew if I even mentioned it, he would get upset. Well, I tried to say something yesterday, and sure enough, he got upset before I could even explain all of my concerns. Now, we are just "being civil" but not really talking. Which is not like us. I don't know what to say or do anymore. There is too much as stake with our health, our home, our lives, our animals etc. We need to have tires put on our car, and get the transmission checked. I just feel I should at least be able to voice my concerns. I realize he is looking forward to showing my DC an seeing his step-Mom, and she is all hyped up also. But, I feel my concerns are legitimate and postponing the trip would be better, and then we won't have such worries on our plate in a few months. I don't know what to do honestly.

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