It was serene and surreal - both - me there with her, holding her tiny hand in mine, as I "knew" like I said I would that "time" was near, and she was ready to go "home" to be with my Dad, and all of the loved ones, that had passed away before her. As I sang several hymns to her, all of which were songs that she so loved to hear my Dad sing, and did here him sing, many, many times over, and I finished the last of the old hymn "Pearly White City", Mom drew one last breath, and that was it, and it goes "Tis' finished".
There was such a mixed emotion there just the two of us, so silent, yet the moment spoke in volumes that I knew she was at peace, no more pain, no more suffering, no more of laying there, having no quality of life... and I had lost not just my Mom, but someone I had grown very close to over the past 10 years in different ways, and the thoughts of all of our laughs, fears, talks, trips to the Winstar over the years, and all came flooding over me, like some of the floods we have experienced as of late, yet much in a good way.
I suddenly felt "peace" also. I suddenly in my heart of hearts knew, that all we had "endured" over the past at least 8 to 9 months and really much longer, now was over, and we could both rest in the fact, that she moved on to be "better" and my own "job" here on Earth is far from finished.
Not just "things" to do because of her passing, but LIFE to live, that I know now was waiting for this to happen. NOW, is when after things are settled that I shall finish my 3rd book, because "her story" shall be a part of that book.
I want to once again extend such a thank you to our Physician's Choice Home Health Care here in Ennis, as well as our Family First Hospice. All of them, especially that last week with the Hospice people would been so much more difficult had it not been for them. They look this horrible situation, and made it a bit easier to bear.
I am in gratitude of Keever's Funeral Home, Father John from the St. John's Catholic Church here in Ennis also, the Ennis Flower Shop who did such a beautiful job on the casket spray, and everyone else who sent their wishes, flowers, donations, and put their love and arms around my family, as we dealt with and continue to deal with a very sudden loss.
As the days move forward I will now be able to begin another realm and branch of my journey here, in my writing, and in my life. Of course there are still many things on the "list" of to do's, yet as I do those, I will now be able to get more back into my own writing, and pray that my "voice" shall once again speak to me in order for me to complete my 3rd book, and publish it.
I also have more advocacy work to do, since Alzheiemer's/Dementia, especially Lewey Bodies Dementia, will become a huge part of my advocacy work....
I wanted to catch each of you up, and let you know what is happening, give you some links also, and again tell you how much I so appreciate your reading my posts, and continuing to follow this journey we call life.....