From Running, to walking, to running, and trying to get my body to keep up and the Lupus and RA to "behave" - Remodeling, Houses, Contractors, and Coping

Well I did have one contractor come over yesterday afternoon, and I got tickled - he was impressed how much work I have already done! I told him I would continue to do what I can, what my body and hands allow me to, and that way when they get where they can come, they can do the larger things like the railings, and the fence... and later side that garage and put a new door on it. I am in a mood I guess I cannot describe.... I have not really been here very much, it seems all I do is run, run and run... I had to take a huge amount of shred stuff to Waxahachie yesterday, so I drove the Elantra to get those miles on it so the computer will register correctly for the inspection. Then I went into Lowe's, bought a couple of "toggle" switches, I really want to use those in that house also... and then some plates for the outlets, again several need the updated outlets in them... I looked at flooring, the laid linoleum... even though I would love to do something else, with the pups, I think I am going to have to stay with that, and actually the one I like is a "standard" at Lowe's... plus they would even lay it very reasonably, if so happen something went awry and my contractor could not do it... I FOUND MY GLITTER FOR THE PAINT! I knew they would have it! I had to search and search, then finally asked two people and one lady knew exactly where it was (which was in a very stupid spot if anyone wanted to find it).... I priced fencing, and I did 5 5 pieces of chair railing... that should be enough to finish the living room! So, a few touch ups with the paint, and putting those up.... I have a new door knob for the front closet... that stupid thing broke about a month ago, and there was no way to get into the front closet, I beat on it, I pried on it, I even took the pins out of the door, and I thought I would never get it open... so finally when the plumbers came, they thought they may need to get in there, and they were able (with a great deal of elbow grease) to get it open finally... of course between myself and them we destroyed that door knob... NEVER in my life, have I seen an "inside knob" that damned sturdy.... I never thought I would get it out... so I bought one with the plates and a glass knob on it... I wanted to do that in this house to all of the closets and never got around to it... and on Amazon I can get the whole thing for about 14.00 including the back plate... so I am going to put that up after I get that closet painted... those closets have NOT been painted since we moved in which was about 1964 or so! Dad painted and did everything else, BUT not the closets, they are horrible! So, paint that is left over, that is okay colors I am going to use in the closets.... anyway, I still have lots to go... I am having him build me, kind of like a cedar platform off the front porch, so it will be large enough to hold my inside plants when I put them out during the spring and summer months.... the porch... OMG those rails were so rotten... I took all of them down myself earlier this week. I only like one post, that the concrete bolts had paint on them so I had to WD 40 them and now I can get those loose also.... I hope between me working until the other guy can come, I will have him paint the ceilings also... no way I can do that... and finish up the stuff I cannot do... I will be moving in by the end of October, first of November... I hope... depends on my own health, the weather, how quickly he can come and get on it... like I told him the garage siding can wait for a bit... mainly the fence, finishing up the painting inside, and I've found a kit I maybe able to help the inside of that damned old tub look better... I am going to order one and try it... it is hideous, but having someone come and redo the porcelain on it would be thousands of dollars... I still want to break that sucker into pieces, get rid of it and put a walk in shower in there... but I know the work trying to take a sledge hammer or a saw to that tub and cut it out of there, it takes lots of work...... Anyway, again I am in a "funky" frame of mind right now... I thought moving over there would be what I wanted, especially after the remodel, now I wonder if that is a good decision, but I cannot do the work this house needs... I cannot roof it, and could paint it outside, but only so much, and it just needs someone who can do the things it needs themselves... a time ago, I could have done it all but the roof! LOL! but that was when I was in my 20's and 30's..... I have painted an entire house outside more than once for sure.... but at my age and with my health issues, my body is already mad at me... my right hand keeps swelling up, and my right ankle is still not all the way well.. and my neck NEEDS SURGERY! I was so hoping to get that done before the end of the year... once again I face whether to keep my insurance or go back to another, and that is coming up soon...more stuff that needs to be done!  Rhia

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Strange "Fungi" Looks like Shelves on a rotted tree in my back yard!

 TALK about like something out of a Sci-Fi Movie! this old rotted tree which has been partially dead now for several years, had a "few" of these on it way back ago BUT, after last week when a huge piece of it fell into my back yard, the next day ALL OF THESE WERE ON THE REMAINDER OF IT! I could NOT believe they came up like overnight1 It has rained and I guess that is what really started them going....

When I looked them up, there are MANY types, lot of times this happens with Oak trees and it is what kills them... This was not an Oak tree, and I don't think they killed it... but they talk about a certain type of beetle that can cause this to start... it is just so strange to me. I've never seen anything like this in my "neck of the woods before"!

New Clinical Trial by Cure Click for Post Shingles Pain

Pain after #shingles? Studies for people with post-shingles pain. No-cost study medication. See if you qualify. 




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"Pain Patient Bills of Rights"

In Honor of Pain Awareness Month Here is one "Chronic Pain Bill of Rights"

https://paindoctor.com/pain-awareness-month-picking-pieces/

Brought to you by "Pain Doctor" http://www.paindoctor.com

Many may think some of this is just "a normal way it should be for those suffering. Yet, you would be shocked at those, even medical specialists that STILL DO NOT BELIEVE how badly Chronic Pain can be, and just how it steal your entire quality of Life!

NPR - Trying to Find Solace from Isolation - A support Group

I have a question for EVERYONE that is either interested in an "online support group for chronic pain and illnesses OR having a Local" group here in my home town - all that are fairly close here in Ennis, Waxahachie, Ellis, Navarro Counties, I have given thought to this for a long time... here is an article from the National Pain Report. - I know many of you feel "isolated" and alone like I do when it comes to our chronic pain and illnesses. Even though we may have family or friends that "try and understand" it is NOT the same thing as having people around you that KNOW because THEY TOO are going through the exact same thing. With the entire ordeal now over chronic pain, and pain medications, and also the use in some states who have legalized "pot" - we still have much stigma, many that do NOT believe us, even the professionals, and trying to cope with that can be almost unbearable. You are already dealing with chronic daily illnesses and pain, then to try and go through "daily life" surrounded by many that may not support or even believe you is devastating. So, PLEASE SPREAD THIS AROUND!!! I will put it up on my blog, my newspaper, and around, but I also NEED HELP IN GETTING THE WORD OUT. If I have enough local people I may consider a group locally. If not, then something online, BUT something that truly gives everyone support.. not just the same old thing.., sometimes groups just don't make it because people become frustrated when they cannot really get the help they need, yet they are putting their time and effort into it. A couple of examples - in the past month, I have had my eye specialist, that I have been going to CANCEL ON THE DAY OF MY APPT. and NOT CALL ME! So, happens, I just had that "feeling in my gut" and since I have to drive about 15 to 20 miles to see him, I called the 2nd time and sure enough, they had "moved" my appt to 11:45AM and it was supposed to be at 2:45PM....NO ONE called at all... and then when they rescheduled it was going to be another 3 or 4 weeks AGAIN before he could see me! It wasted MY TIME getting dressed and ready, when I could have been doing other things, it put off once again an exam that is already way past due partially because of one of my Lupus medications that can cause macular degeneration, and my eyes and glasses are WAY OFF! I am having headaches, not sure if the glasses are related , BUT I got upset. So, I called another eye doctor in Waxahachie and he could see me the next day! But, I had another appt. with the plumbers, so they could see me that Friday! I got there, was checked in and lots of people were coming in and out, so it is a fairly busy office. But, they got to me promptly within 5 to about 8 minutes of my scheduled appt time... they were very accurate with the latest type of equipment, and in fact, so good, I did NOT have to go through old "dilation" of my eyes. He had some very up to date digital equipment that read everything very accurately. I saw him, he told me that I was okay, and no signs of the degeneration, BUT of course I have "cataracts" that are NOT near ready to be fixed. They are not "ripe" enough I believe is what they call it. So, I decided since my exam cost me NOTHING, no co=pay at all, and my insurance was giving me 40% OFF my lenses, frames, and 20% off of the "changing to darker" transitions I guess, and the doctor had put in my script all of that, plus my special prisms that have to be in them due to the double vision.... so I saved something like 160.00 or so on the frames, lenses, and all they needed to be added..., I was SO PLEASED AND WILL DEFINITELY RECOMMEND him to anyone in this area. His staff were extremely nice, they knew their "stuff" and I was so pleased that they were all so very nice and polite! Of course NOW I await my glasses, and did this the Friday before Labor Day, so I am sure it maybe the end of this week (hopefully) before I get them in... the prisms also sometimes take an extra day or so, so it will be 2 weeks this coming Friday. I hop they get here.... But that is JUST ONE EXAMPLE of us as CHRONIC PAIN OR ILLNESS patients (and others when it comes to their time) that is something I should NOT have had to deal with. Doctors EXPECT US TO BE ON TIME AND CALL 24 HOURS AHEAD IF WE CANNOT MAKE AN APPT. - but OUR time is NOT as important for them... Another example was the same as my own regular MD's office. I had an appt. week before last, I was already there and IN THE ROOM waiting for him.... and the nurse steps in to tell me he is "running behind" and would I prefer to reschedule? I TOTALLY understand sometimes emergencies arise, BUT again that has happened to me several times with him over the past couple of years.... those are things that are so frustrating, and especially when you are chronically ill, in pain, & already having been fatigued, plus dealing with showering, dressing and getting yourself to the doctors office.... so, I can see so MANY different aspects of how a online or in person group, potentially could be so beneficial to so many of us. As I told my daughter just this morning, with Mom gone, I have NO ONE HERE to talk with, visit with, etc... my daughter, and I are close as far as talking to one another at least 4 times a week, but she is 8 hours away as far as being physically close... my son is also working and does not live close by, so it is not like I had when Mom and I were within 5or 6 blocks of one another... I feel so very isolated and alone... plus I am dealing with a HUGE amount of guilt, due to issues my Mom left that I didn't know about, thus now I am having to try and cope with... and had I known before she got so ill, I may have been able to "fix" what she has kind of "wronged" leaving me hanging with it all... anyway, just a thought about a group and the article I read.,

http://nationalpainreport.com/chronic-pain-isolation-start-a-support-group-8830919.html

Grieving the Loss of a Loved One BEFORE they are no longer gone but you are a caretaker due to a chronic terminal illness...

I've been going through a really "odd" (pr what I felt was odd) kind of issue since Mom passed away in June. I kept telling others that I almost feel as if I am "still in shock" rather than in the "grieving process" and all these weeks and weeks, I kept "waiting" for those signs to appear, and they have in some ways...

yet I have felt angry and almost ashamed of myself, for "not showing" grief in losing Mom... daily now for weeks, I keep wanting to "call her" or run over to tell her something, and even though I am there almost everyday doing the remodeling, this feels different... then of course I realize no longer can I "talk with her here", call to see if she is okay, and usually have my own set of "life's issues" that I could talk to her about... 

well after much thought about it all, right now I am dealing with a great deal of almost feeling like "her life was dropped in my lap" kind of thing, but, I looked it up, and as I've mentioned, I had been "grieving" the loss of my Mom for months and months way before she was "bedridden"... 

and didn't know me, nor even where she was or who she was... I had that "grief" daily, from moment to moment, it was every changing, depending on what was going on at that time, or on that day... thus although it still sounds horrid, when she took that last breath, I felt at that moment "relief" for HER... no more suffering, hurting, crying, diapers, and lying in bed, she was finally "home" with Dad, and her family.... 

so here is one article I just read and decided I would post it...for weeks now I have felt like I am just "insane" yet what I've been through and am going through is all a part of the process... 


https://www.agingcare.com/Articles/grieving-before-death-terminally-ill-116037.htm