Showing posts with label #chronic pain. Show all posts
Showing posts with label #chronic pain. Show all posts

Sunday, July 9, 2023

YOU are The Stage In My Life...

 You are the Stage of my Life….

Can you see…the oceans flashing, the rivers flowing…ever haunting you day and night..

Oh My Soul…Must you stand there just to think ..I was born blind??

If you look deeply, deeper and deeper into this heart…you know it beats for you..

Please don’t ever break this spell that you have me under.. it’s pure/..”Tis true.

The touch of your fingers upon my skin…that little smile that you know drives me wild..

I’ve danced, ran, & crawled across the stages of my life… I loved ..always in strife.. only you I want to be beside.

Sometimes I have no clue….how I could fall so deeply for you?

Then I see that smile and I realize you’ve always been within my view…

Passion, the realm of silent…deeply…profusely…kind of the madness of love..

It’s what brings me to my knees, pleads for you…my saving Grace… as the plants above.

We can roll with all the stages…all the races…all of the spaces destined to be…

I see it so clearly, so sensually …pre-destined…. destiny…

Rhia Steele

Copyright 7/9/2023

Tuesday, June 13, 2023

Chaos, Life, Love, Chronic Illnesses, and Chronic Pain...

Unless you have never used a computer; the internet, IP address... you couldn’t possibly not know how much people GAIN online. Friendships, long lasting relationships, new friends ...yes there are the "rotten ones" who try and screw things you do for people enjoying here or wherever life takes you.

It’s been nothing but, chaos, still in wars, spending budget of a TRILLION DOLLARS Ridiculous! THEN WE allow them to pull these stunts that are driving our good doctors to retire or not see certain Patients.

Due to the DEA and all on FDA, ALL of Congress & House of Reps, for legitimate chronic pain patients of all kinds. Ruining our lives, having no close person who has gone through this.THIS HORRIBLE, at times out of control pain is causing people with extreme pain, to find another opportunity or mode to help with the chronic pain.

I am so totally disgusted with ALL of our supposedly voted officials. They sure haven’t

HEARD THE PEOPLE! We are supposed to have many FREEDOMS!  Yet the government has a say over it one way or the other .I feel the ENTIRE FEDERAL GOVERNMENT need to removed ad we need SMART AND HONEST in D.C.

We; as a nation with all of these highly intelligent people in our 50 states; we could have the best…of the best. PEOPLE NEED THEIR FREEDOMS BACK!

It’s asinine what goes on in the Medical Community. What is so much more disturbing is just HOW deep along are just the the governments untold stories, the lies, the corruption, taking rights away of the people…..

It’s like an earthquake not showing at 1st. It’s the RUMBLINGS we Hear. THIS is ALL of our governmental  bodies. They are rumbling and soon huge fractures will divide many of us. I almost fear (not in my lifetime) another “civil war”…people are getting fed up. 

I’ve seen it, walked through it, bogged down in it, done it, regretted it, been there …literally wrote two published books and I’m working on a couple of new ones. If I look I probably have a T-shirt with it, journals full are filled and over flowing..I’ve been so bowled over; with you & it’s like the rushing water pouring over a waterfall….. fresh, pure, true.

I’ve not touched in this writing piece about my health issues, nor any other personal issues. I DO  and WILL share my journey…

It is long and tedious. It’s time taken away, surgeries, doctors, medications, side effects,  and everything in between.

Chronically Ill people generally have some type of “chronic pain issue” also. They tend to work hand in hand. It began for me when I was about 14 years old. I had my right knee torn up playing baseball with some friends. One kid used me instead of 2nd base. He slid into my leg and tore the cartilage in my knee. I had already had a tonsillectomy when I was about 11 years old.

As I work on finishing my “autobiography” it includes ILLNESS, HEALTH and so forth. It also WILL POUR out what else has happened to me even before the health issues. I have a “hole” in me…I have “scars” I can talk about now…

I’ve been so frightened at 14 years old that I couldn’t even tell my Dad. In fact, I couldn’t go to my Mom at first. I went to our next door neighbor. She was a nurse and like a “2nd Mom” to me.

I won’t go into details here; but I am sure although we didn’t have the term “PTSD”; that is certainly what I had.

Life has ebbed and flowed; it has almost drowned me, tormented me and ‘brings me down to my knees” …sobbing inconsolably. I have stood upon the top of one of the highest peaks in Colorado. I jumped what seemed like “STRAIGHT DOWN” from atop that mountain into snow over head deep if you ever lost a ski or lost your footing.  Those ‘double black diamonds” slopes were THE best! What a rush!

I never had one thought about packing up and moving to Austin, to California… I loved driving trips! I would get in my car, and drive half way from Seattle to Lancaster CA. I have a dear friend there. In fact I lived there about 4 months.

I drove from Phoenix AZ to Nebraska! I thought the drive from Nebraska to just South of Dallas Texas would be endless. There was literally nothing for miles and miles to see. Flat land, no houses, no place to buy anything. I felt like the world just maybe flat and I missed Texas somewhere the drive was so long.

Anyone who has never been to Texas…or you have not driven through Texas, it is one HUGE state. From North to South down to Brownsville and at the Mexico border is a days drive!

Already had 2 major knee surgeries before I was 22 years old. I also already had “signs” of osteoarthritis. Back then the doctors said it was an “old” person’s illness; young people don’t have arthritis. LITTLE did they know then.

I lived my life “bass ackwards” When I was a teenager I was at home, with my music, my writing, dancing, piano and I didn’t do what “normal” teenagers did. My Dad was extremely overprotective. When I was single; in my early twenties, I acted like a teenager. It really continued throughout my entire life. At times I do stuff most grown ups would be what the hell is she thinking? I have to laugh.   ahh…I shall continue……

I have a “soft spot” for others hurting. Whether it is a physical pain, emotional, mental anguish, or someone just needing to “vent” I am always “listening”, “watching” and paying close attention. After some of the things I waded through; my whole purpose I feel is to help others. 

I understand how it feels to NEED someone to just ”listen” let me ramble..and I am over it. You shall see me REALLY get a bit (more than a bit)  peeved when I feel there is an injustice happening to a person or a group of people.

It RIPS my soul to see someone mistreated. As many wonderful people there still are in this world; there are also MANY that have total disregard for others. You will see me come unglued at times; because I just cannot stand the thought of anyone being harmed in any form. 

I wear my heart on my sleeve. I cry much more than I admit. I am so soft hearted; I sometimes “forget” how cruel some people can be. That includes some Doctors and others working in the Medical field. I’ve certainly went through my share of doctors that should remember their “code”.. DO NO HARM! 

I have one that is who did my cervical neck surgery and he did my reverse shoulder replacement well before anyone else in the Dallas/Ft. Worth area. He is an incredible surgeon. But he lacks having a good bedside manner. He also does not like an “educated” patient. He and I got into it over a CT Scan of my neck before my 2nd cervical neck surgery. 

I said something about the CT Scan NOT showing as much damage as was in my cervical spine. He asked me if I was a “Radiologist”! I said “NO” but I know my body. Plus, every time I have ever had a CT Scan before a surgery, when they do surgery the doctors come out and say things were much worse than the CT Scans. He upset me so badly I got up, walked out sobbing. 

After he did the surgery, he came after I woke up and apologized to me. He admitted I was correct. I know he really did NOT want to admit I was right. But, he did. Of course, I am not an expert. I realize that many of us with “chronic health issues and/or chronic pain KNOW how we feel. We also have educated ourselves. We must watch out for ourselves the way things are now.

Everything is so much different than even 10 years ago. I used to go to one doctor who took care of most anything. I am fortunate to have an incredible Primary Care Physician.  I became his patient (one of the first) when he first arrived here. He is brilliant. He knows more about Lupus, RA, and ALL of my other health issues. I can send him a message through the portal and if he is in the office, I have an answer that day. 

Friday, April 28, 2023

Study Linking Suicides to Rx Opioids Not Supported by Data


Study Linking Suicides to Rx Opioids Not Supported by Data

..."Recently, an article in the American Journal of Psychiatry (AJP) that was widely covered in the lay press, suggested that reductions in the chronic use of prescribed opioids for patients with pain slowed an otherwise discouraging national 20-year rise in suicides. Further, the paper suggests its findings should alleviate concerns about dose reductions in pain patients who have relied on these medicines long term. However, these conclusions were not supported by the data in the study or in any other available data.

Given rising national concern about a burgeoning opioid crisis, many doctors forcibly reduced doses in long-term recipients of prescribed opioids, often under pressure from regulators and boards. Unfortunately, suicides started happening among patients who were taken off their medication. "

see the rest on the link....

Friday, July 16, 2021

How Chronic Pain Can Lead to Autoimmunity Problems — Pain News Network

How Chronic Pain Can Lead to Autoimmunity Problems — Pain News Network: By Forest Tennant, PNN Columnist Every chronic pain patient must know and understand autoimmunity and how to combat it. Research on chronic pain has unequivocally determined that the chronic inflammation and tissue destruction caused by a painful disease or injury will produce autoimmunity. ...

and my notes about this also  ...  Goes to prove just how SERIOUS Chronic Pain that is not treated properly due to those pharmacists or physicians due to nw not wanting t prescribe the right medications and/or in the correct amounts for chronic pain patients. I feel even my own pain physician, a superior specialist in this field that I have been seeing now for well over 13 years, he put in my pain pump & has treated me all these years without any issues. Suddenly, over the past year he began to shy away from one of my meds after he was giving it to me monthly for all that time, I now have to continually "remind" them to get the prescription to me, & this last time, the "woman" who I did not know, (I called the regular lady I've talked to for all these years at her personal ext. and get a phone call back from someone I did not know who talked to me likeI was someone who was trying to "abuse" meds... it is infuriating for her to even know some of my medical issues that were none of her business. She began to speak to me as if she was my doctor! I am still furious. Those are the things more and more chronic pain patients are having to put up with even with a doctor who has treated them for years and/or the same pharmacist! It needs to be put to a halt & the "real" issues of "fake medications" are being made in Mexico and shipped over here under the names of real prescriptions here causing severe issues. there are people that have are in s much pain that suddenly get treated like this, lose their doctors, or the doctors quit treating them as always & they get so depressed they have been known to commit suicide, although that is hard to say it's true. - Here is an article by the "Pain News Network" that tells some of our story. I have lived with "chronic pain" since I was 17 years old when I suddenly even before my 1st child was born in 19799 having severe migraines. I have fought tooth and nail through every type of doctor, through every type of tests some of them multiple times, been treated like I was an "addict" & at now over 55 years old, still continue to have t at time "fight" for my own right to proper treatment.

Wednesday, August 5, 2020

Wednesday August 5th 2020 My Newspaper all things Autoimmune, COVID -19 and more

Wednesday August 5th 2020 My Newspaper all things Autoimmune, COVID -19 and more  

                                                                                                            Life Chronic Pain & Autoimmune Systemic 

              Diseases & Dementia


Friday, July 31, 2020

New Post for Pseudogout, Blood transfusion, Severe Anemia, RA Severe Pain & COVID Virtual Visits & more...

I really have SO MUCH to try & catch up here on, so I am going ton"Post"n some of my ongoing chronic health issues, things about COVID, my 2 unit blood transfusions RA, other meds, so many Lab tests, Virtual Visits and more...

More about my Life Living with RA, Lupus, Pseudo-Gout, Severe Anemia & Making My Home Put Together Alone, through the Pain and all that comes with these illnesses.

As I said day before yesterday I CAN HAVE THE STRANGEST MESS HAPPEN AT MY HOUSE!!! 1ST OF ALL I am so embarrassed to even talk about it..I HAD A "VIRTUAL VISIT SCHEDULED WITH MY RHEUMATOLOGIST AT 2:40PM OR 2:15 PM.. THEY SENT ONE THE 2:40 FROM HIS NURSE AND THE APPT. PART OF THE PORTAL SAID 2:15 OKAY as usual between my dogs up & down and the pain in my back & hips, and hands.. I was UP by 3:30AM yesterday morning...Well, I did several things during the day around the house, did laundry, I have even putting things "more in order" rather than scattered around, for instance al of my hand cleaners & sanitizers.. by the way I DID GET MY 2 CORDLESS NEW BLINDS UPAFTER 3 DAYS OVER THE KITCHEN SINK AND THEY ARE AWESOME!!! ANYWAY, I WENT AHEAD ORDERED 2 MORE FOR THE NORTH SIDE OF MY KITCHEN, SINCE INE OF THOSE WERE FALLING APART & I wanted 2 get them ALL THE SAME! So, those were so much easier than dealing with over the sink and around "rotten light fixture that is another story. I also KNOW I have to put up a new light over the sink, because it is so "rotten" where some of the plastic things are they have cracked, and after 14 years, it is just a mess. I spent some of yesterday trying to find one of those that was NOT $$$ of dollars! I also looked for a few other minor things for the house etc... Also I was HURTING LIKE HECK... THE HUMIDITY WAS HORRIBLE & AFTER UP AND DOWN THAT SNALL LADDER WITH THOSE BLINDS, AND THEN WORKING ON THAT DANGED ROTTEN TREE, THEY WERE AND ARE IN BAD SHAPE...Plus I of course have things around the house I can "work on" .. my HAIR is a mess to say the least and since I had that Virtual APPL. with my RHEUMY yesterday I had tried to do "something with it" Well it was about an hour till the computer visit and more, so I decided to it down with the pups for a few minutes, decide on dinner, then it would be time. NOW the fans are going, the A/C Unit is on and all are LOUD.. I had the TV on.. the dogs were right beside me and of course when I NEED them to BARK they don't.. So suddenly I jumped up & I had DOZED OFF & WASALREADY LATE FOR MY APPT!!!! and of all things it was with DR.Q. HIMSELF, AND I RARELY GET TO SEE HIM! I usually see his PA.. I was headed to the computer & to get the program pulled up and my home phones rings! It is MY DOCTOR!!!!! Plus after the call, I found out he tried 2 TIMES ON MY CELL (BUT IT WAS CHARGING IN THE OFFICE & I COULDN'T HEAR IT & I NEVER HEARD THE HOME PHONE THE 1ST IME HE TRIED EITHER... OMG!!! I WANTED TO CRAWL UNDER THE COMPUTER... I WAS TOTALLY MORTIFIED.. NVER , EVER HAD I DONE THAT.. NOW GET THIS.. HEB AND I WAS TALKING ABOUT MY MEDICAL STUFF ON THE PHONE WHILE I PULLED UP THE VIRTUAL PROGRAM THEY USE AND FINALLY ABOUT THE TIME I CAN EVERYTHING SET UP... MY DOG IS BARKING, BARKING AND MORE... & I KNOW SINCE IT WAS JUST IN THE NEXT ROOM in the living room, at the front door MY DR. COULD HEAR IT!!! Anyway, he did say that the program they use to do the visit had problems yesterday and he thought maybe I was having he was working "from home" and not the office yesterday. He isSTILL very DISTRESSED over the ANEMIA... & wants to do some other types of blood tests, and he wants me to see a HEMATOLOGIST FOR A BONE MARROW BIOPSY. Which is what I thought also.. he put me back on the Colcrys for the Pseudo-gout.. and he thought "maybe" the "MTX" the Methotrexate I take and have been taking a long time off and on "maybe" making the anemia worse. We talked about some other meds etc, but 1st he wants that bone marrow biopsy. BUT RIGHT NOW I AM EXTREMELY FEARFUL OF HAVING THAT TYPE OF PROCEDURE DURING THIS PANDEMIC! He told me he would find a very reputable Hematologist but I also have to make sure my insurance TAKES THE DOCTOR. AND USUALLY HE LET'S DR. B.; MY PCP'S OFFICE DO MY BLOOD DRAWS, SEND THEM OFF & SEND THEM PCP AND MYSELF.Well he was at home & was not sure about getting the Lab orders over to my PCP's office, which he could send them to me on the portal & I can take them... I have CLUE where the closest Lab Quest is & I am NOT driving to Dallas for it... Quest picks up with my PCP.. so all I need is Dr. Q to give the orders to his office or over the portal.. anything to save me driving somewhere especially right now in a busy Lab office somewhere in Dallas.THEN to top it off after dinner I went outside like I always do and walked around & everything seemed to be 'Fine".. I went back in for about an hour & had my front door partially shut do to the heat but I walk out and my Bird Bath is completely turned over (it is anchored in the ground" even though it is fairly lite) then I see FEATHERS everywhere! Then I walk to the North side of the house & the cat that hangs around was laying in the neighbor's portion o the drive way but nothing like feathers so I figure the bird got away..Well SOMETHING TOLD ME to check the ground to the SOUTH side and look. Sure enough here is the remains of a large bird probably a dove, one wing one place and turn up another part of the bird further down right beside my house!!! Well by Now I am TOTALLY LOSING IT!!!

Wednesday, January 6, 2016





This is from the National Pain Report and is in my latest addition of my newspaper that comes out daily, "All Things Autoimmune".... PLEASE PARTICIPATE or Let others know if you can.... this is such a crucial issue right now... we need every opportunity to get our "words" in about the seriousness of "true pain patients" and how it can destroy their qualify of lives without the proper medications!!!!!